Ways we can tell stress to fuck off

We’ve all got stresses in our life whether it be work, home, family life etc. I have been through a particular stressful time as I got married this year and had a big wedding, so I’m not gonna lie that was pretty fucking stressful. My head nearly fell off a few times.

I wasn’t a bridezilla in the lead up I was quite easy going about things going wrong. Everyone said I was doing OK and seemed really laid back. What they didn’t know was that I was having the worst insomnia, literally waking up at 3am thinking of things that needed to be done. I couldn’t get back to sleep until I had made a list on my phone detailing what needed to be done, who was going to do it and when. Everyone had to be organised and paid, and I was getting constant e mails, calls and questions in the two months before. Every morning I would go through my lists and think I had it all under control, but in reality I was fucking knackered! I was at work every morning looking like a zombie. On top of a hectic full time job, social life and going to the gym four times a week I was fucked! So I tried a few de stress techniques and they really helped me. 

I’m by no means a doctor or anything (couldn’t be further from it) but these tips have really helped me. Let’s get in the zone lads. Breathe.

Animals are amazing stress relief! I promise you. That’s why they are used now for therapy visiting schools, hospitals, homes for the elderly etc. I think it’s a smashing idea. 

A long time lover of golden retrievers, I’m one of those embarrassing people that has to run up to dogs and make a fuss of them in the street. When I see one it makes me so happy. My heart literally lifts with endorphins.

Pets can offer comfort in a relaxed environment, and who doesn’t feel better once they’ve stroked a pet? 

This is such a simple one but so effective. Phones are linked with stress, there’s not a doubt about that. Whether you’re looking at perfect pictures on Instagram and everyone parading their ‘perfect’ lives, or you’ve got loads of shitty e mails and you’ve not texted anyone back, leave the phone alone for a bit. No one will die and the world will continue, but everyone needs a break. You need ‘you time’, and that means you and not your phone.

Losing yourself in something else, not your phone.

I thought I was too much of a tit for yoga, like I would burst out laughing in the class and not take it seriously! And to be honest the first couple of times I went with a mate and I did laugh a lot! Very immature I know, but I felt really awkward. 

But then I started going on my own and something changed. I started concentrating on the positions, the posture and the breathing and it really helped me. I had to go for an MRI scan (which is fucking terrifying if you’re claustrophobic like me) and I used the breathing techniques from yoga to breathe through that and concentrated on my breath, rather than the fact I felt like I was in a fucking coffin. I also used the breathing techniques when I was having my eye brows micro bladed, because the numbing cream was shit and I felt like someone was stabbing me in the face.   

When you are in yoga and you focus you just think about the positions you are doing and what your body is doing, rather than what other stresses you have going on. You’re less distracted by other thoughts. 

Also it’s good for your physical health! 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not flexible by any means, my bingo wings and arms still wobble like they are going out of fashion. I still can’t bloody touch my toes, but I’m getting there! 

It’s so hard to read these days with our hectic lives! But if you make time for it it can be so rewarding. It’s such an old school way to relax and I think it’s marvellous. 

I read every night before bed, even if it’s five to ten minutes it’s something. It’s so much better reading an actual book than pissing about on your phone. 

Losing yourself in a good plot is the ultimate relaxation. You end up distracting yourself in the best possible way. 

Read whatever floats your boat, I’m a sucker for cheesy romance novels, but I also love a good historical novel where I can transport myself to a different era, and pretend I’m a nurse in World War Two. My husband loves food (don’t we all) and is really into reading cookbooks. Even a magazine or celebrity’s autobiography. Whatever you’re interested in. 

It’s exercise for the mind people!

Most de stress lists will probably tell you to eat something healthy, but I think that is a load of shit. You will never get a better feeling eating a piece of lettuce than you will if you treat yourself to a Krispy Kreme Nutella doughnut. Life is too short, and as long as you’re not having ten doughnuts a day, you’re sound. Everything in moderation, obvs. 

Chocolate stimulates the brain to release endorphins too. But have a Maccys if not or a Subway foot long, whatever floats your boat. Treating yourself to your favourite food can make you feel so much better.

Another way to de stress is to make something naughty to eat. I know I feel better if I’ve made a shit load of cupcakes, and I end up concentrating on that rather than anything else.

Call a mate who you know will make you piss yourself laughing, or watch something funny on telly. I highly recommend ‘Bridesmaids,’ even though I’ve seen it a million times it always gets me going. I also love The Hangover, Airplane and Dumb and Dumber. But watch whatever floats your boat.

They said (don’t know who exactly but some clever bastard said it) laughter is the best medicine, and that’s so true. 

I have a colleague at work that can get me going, and we end up physically crying laughing so much, my false eyelashes are always fucked. But it’s worth it. 

Humour can be found everywhere, you just need to find it.

I dunno about you but if I hear the first few beats of ‘Play that funky music white boy’ I literally can’t sit still and I feel like I can give Beyoncé a good run for her money. Amelie is the same with ‘Sexyback,’ I can see her shoulders wriggling from the first beat. 

Music is a therapy in itself in a way, that’s way it should be.

Even if you’re dancing around your room on your own like a tit no one will see, and it’s a great stress reliever. If you don’t have time to dance around your room, get some of your favourite up beat tunes on in the car and sing a long. I’m a massive Mariah, Whitney and Spice girls fan, don’t be embarrassed, just listen to what you love and sing and move to the music. Who gives a shit.

When I’m stressed and I share whatever issue I’m going through with my besties, it feels so good to have their support and they are always so positive about everything. Talking through issues with your mates can help find solutions, and it’s a perfect excuse to get together and get absolutely rat arsed.

It can even take your mind off things, you can find out how they’re doing and what experiences they have had that have been similar.

Amelie and Freya aren’t just my best mates, they’re like my life coaches! I go to them with any issues and their support is so important to me. Don’t know how I ever got through life without them.

Stress is fucking shit. It is linked to so many health issues, and it’s an issue we all face which is completely normal. We can’t control what we are worried or stressed about, but we can control how we deal with it. 

How do you deal with stress? Can you tell me how you have coped and what you have found helped with it? 


Clara x 

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